MAILBAG: I’m Completely Fed Up With Bochurim Hurting My Parnassah. It Has To Stop

One of the nicest aspects of Purim are the scenes of bochurim spending their day fundraising for various worthy causes. But one of the darkest aspects of the days leading up to Purim are bochurim spending their day fundraising for various causes.

Allow me to elaborate a bit: I work. I work hard. Very hard, in fact. I’m not wealthy, but I get by. And the way I get by is through putting in the hours necessary to make my business successful. Without that effort, my family would be on the bread line.

The same is true for many other ehrliche baalebatim like myself. Unfortunately, over the past two weeks or so, my cellphone has been ringing almost nonstop from bochurim collecting. I don’t have a problem per se with bochurim raising funds (though it seems a rather less-than-ideal occupation for boys who are supposed to be learning as much as possible). However, as much as they need the money for these causes, I need time to be able to work.

When my phone won’t stop buzzing and ringing all day, I can’t work. And that’s a big problem. In fact, it’s gotten so bad that for the past week I have simply stopped answering all calls from my phone and activated a temporary second number so that I can actually do what I need to do. Yes, really, it’s that bad.

I understand and appreciate the enthusiasm for tzedaka and chesed, I really do. But there have to be limits. What is going on now is unfair, inappropriate, and way over the top.

Mechanchim and parents who encourage their bochurim to do this: STOP. You either don’t know what it’s like to have a job or you don’t care. Either way, it’s wrong.

M. Y. Wertzberger

The views expressed in this letter do not necessarily reflect those of Monsey Scoop. Have an opinion you would like to share? Send them in for review to

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  1. thank you for your letter!!! did you ever try davening in 18 forshay a minute with out a bochur disturbing you???? me neither!!!
    IT MUST STOP!!! we cant daven neither work!! ( nor learn go to the kolllelim its swarmed with guys from israel!!))

    • My heart goes out to you.

      Rather then being thankful that you dont need to walk around with your hand out, you kvetch and complain about others.

      As a Mispallel at Ohr Chaim for years now, I am there almost every day, for all three Tfilos. Seeing the need for so many to rely on others gave me insight as to the plight of our brothers and sisters.

      You have every right to give or not as you see fit. You even have a right in middle of Davening to fully ignore anybody. But to complain and disparage the poor people who need to ask YOU for money, that is in my opinion being thankless to the one who supports us all.

      When we all say מרבים צרכי עמך does it only mean the ones that come when its coinvent for you………

      Whishing you Happiness and for you never to need to stick your hands out to other.

  2. You should be thanking the One Above that you have a job, are healthy enough to work, and have a family to support. Many, many people aren’t so lucky not by a choice of their own. A simple solution would be to turn your phone on silent during the hours that you are working during this week before Purim. Hatzlacha U’Bracha!

  3. why dont you just block their number i have blocked hundreds of numbers from all kind of pests warrants, free gifts etc.get call blocker it really works and you get peace-of mind

  4. Horrible words! This man has no idea what he is saying. He seems to be very selfish and doesn’t seem to understand that raising money is a fundamental Jewish tradition to help those in need.I guarantee that he doesn’t give Tzedaka! I never gets calls but lots of rings on my door. To make life easy I have an envelope with money ready for the boys and I have placed a sign on the door as to when it’s ok to ring the bell! I raven that He and his family never know hunger. I daven that he gets a heart and open it for those in need!
    May Hashem bless us all with easy parnassah !


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